Written by Joanna on 16th Mar 2011 and filed under General
Britney Spears lands her 10th top 10 hit as “Till The World Ends” jumps from #20 to #9 in its second week on the Hot 100. Remarkably, Spears has amassed more top 10 hits in the past four years than she did in the first eight years of her career (when she was at her peak) as a record-seller and pop-culture icon.
Many people wrote Spears off in 2007 when she was going through a hard time in her personal life. In September of that year, after a much mocked performance at the MTV Video Music Awards, Entertainment Weekly ran a cover story: “Oh, The Horror! Is Britney’s Comeback Already Over? Or Does She Have A Prayer?” The headline inside was even worse: “Down For The Count?”
But a funny thing happened on the way to her predicted demise. Spears proceeded to land one of her biggest hits, “Gimme More,” which reached #3 in October 2007. And she has since amassed five more top 10 hits: “Womanizer,” “Circus,” “3,” “Hold It Against Me” and now “Till The World Ends.”
By contrast, from 1998 to 2006, Spears notched just four top 10 hits: “…Baby One More Time,” “(You Drive Me) Crazy,” “Oops!…I Did It Again,” and “Toxic.”
How to explain this? It may be that fans’ relationship with Spears deepened when she went through her troubles. They have seen her through highs and lows; triumphs and humiliations. This is a shift from the way things used to be, when stars when to great lengths to sanitize their images. Karen Carpenter never went public with her battle with anorexia, which made her death in 1983 such a shock to fans. Freddie Mercury finally acknowledged that he had AIDS just one day before his death from AIDS-related complications in 1991.
Written by Joanna on 16th Mar 2011 and filed under General
Billboard Hot 100: Britney Spears has amassed more top 10 hits in the past four years than she did in the 1st eight years of her career. Britney lands her 10th top 10 hit as Till The World Ends jumps from #20 to #9 in its second week on the list. This marks the second time that Spears has had back-to-back top 10 hits. She previously scored in 2008-2009 with “Womanizer” (#1) and “Circus” (#3). Digital sales rank: #5 (158K).
Written by Joanna on 16th Mar 2011 and filed under General
When fans of Jessie J heard that she’d written a track for Britney Spears, many hoped the British pop songstress would impart some of her ”Do It Like a Dude” sassiness on the pop icon.
But as the final track listing for Brit’s upcoming Femme Fatale hit the Web, it became clear that Jessie’s song hadn’t made the cut. When Jessie stopped by MTV News on Wednesday (March 9), though, she told us she’s cool with it.
“I think [it's a] misunderstanding that just because I’m Jessie J, jazz hands, it doesn’t mean that I get pumped up to the top-3 choice,” she explained to us. “It means that I write a song and if it doesn’t go on it, it doesn’t go on it. She probably had every major songwriter in the world write a song for her.”
In fact, the credits for Femme Fatale read like a who’s who of producers and songwriters with big names like Dr. Luke, Max Martin, Bonnie McKee and Rodney Jerkins all making the album. To Jessie, even being considered on a level with those guys is a big deal.
“It’s just, to even have the opportunity to write a song for her is still incredible,” she said. “As a songwriter, I’m still taking baby steps. You have to write 10 songs to get one good one and, realistically, I don’t have time to write 10. It was a good song though.”
Jessie also revealed the title of the track she had offered to Britney. “I may try and pitch it to someone else, but it was actually called ‘Being Britney,’ ” she said. “So, it’s actually hard to pitch it. It was a really cool song, but it is what it is; it happens for a reason. For me, one thing I love about Britney Spears is she is Britney Spears: No one can come and try and steal her path, her lane and that’s what I love about her. That’s what the song is about, ‘I’m the sh–.’ ”
Written by Jasmin on 16th Mar 2011 and filed under General
If you’ve been living under a rock or are, inexplicably, a heterosexual, then you might not yet know that the new Britney Spears album leaked last week and that it is very listenable, although not quite as listenable as Blackout. It seems that Britney has been thinking a lot about the phallus lately, because it makes a sneaky appearance in almost all of the tracks. Some of these shout outs may be missed by the untrained ear, but luckily I’m on hand with a track-by-track countdown of the most blatant penis gags that Spears has to offer.
Joint 12th, 11th and 10th place: ‘Trouble for Me’, ‘Trip to Your Heart’, ‘Gasoline’.
Britney manages to refrain from singing about willies in any of these songs. This means that there is a whole ten minutes and one seconds of Femme Fatale without a crude nod to the place we all began as a teeny tiny tadpole. Disappointing.
9th place: ‘Inside Out’
During this track, Britney discusses a lover who knows her “inside and out”. As if that wasn’t filthy enough, Britney makes her intentions clear, proclaiming: “Even though we couldn’t last forever, you know what I want right now.” Well, if you can’t work out what it is that she wants, I will have to tell you. She wants the lover to put his penis in her vagina. Right now. Dirty cow.
8th place: ‘Till the World Ends’
You could be forgiven for thinking that Britney is speaking literally when she says “Let me blow your mind tonight” but let me warn you that the little minx is not. You are fully aware that everyone says that men think with their cocks, so when she says she wants to blow your mind she is really telling you that she would actually like to blow you. Filth.
7th place: ‘Seal it With a Kiss’
Same as before, except this time she uses some handy Biblical symbolism. “In the shadows where it’s hot, you’re the risk of getting caught. Wanna taste forbidden fruit and seal it with a kiss.” The “forbidden fruit” here is clearly not Eve’s apple that the story of Garden of Eden referred to, but a man’s love instrument. “Seal it with a kiss”? Seal it with some sucking more like!
6th place: ‘Hold it Against Me’
Now, this song is FULL of penis related innuendo that the more innocent listener may not have caught. Firstly, the hook line of “If you said I want your body now, would you hold it against me?” may sound inoffensive enough but what do you think he will be rubbing against poor Brit-Brit when he holds himself against her? Maybe we shouldn’t feel sorry for her. Maybe the “it” she wants held against her is not his body after all, but just the unsuspecting bloke’s tallywacker. This image takes a further sinister turn later in the song when Britney sings: “There’s a spark in between us when we’re dancing on the floor. I want more. Wanna see it. So I’m asking you tonight.”
We were wrong to blame the man for the dick rubbing. Britney is clearly encouraging it. “A spark in between us” that she wants to see? A spark, indeed! Never heard that one before. Yes, Britney’s dishonest intentions are truly revealed by the middle eight, with her begging like a whore on crack: “Give me something good. Don’t wanna wait. I want it now!” Calm down, dear!
5th place: ‘I Wanna Go’
There is no surprise as to where Ms. Spears wants to go. With the line, “I’ve been told who I should do it with, to keep both my hands above the blanket when the light’s out” Britney explores the difficult issue of how to give a handjob when your arms are not under the duvet. The simple advice regarding this issue is to not really bother; handjobs are much better when the hand is under the covers. That is unless the willy is out of the covers, in which case disregard everything I just said.
4th place: ‘How I Roll’
Well, by the time we get to this song, we are fully aware of how Britney likes to roll. Regardless, she fills us in, at one point dropping the F-bomb and muttering “You can be my fuck tonight. We can tear it up tonight.” Someone needs to tell the ex-Mouseketeer that vaginal or anal tearing is no laughing matter.
3rd place: ‘Big Fat Bass’
As if it wasn’t ominous enough that this song featured will.i.am, whose name actually includes the sound “willy”, it would seem that the titular ‘Big Fat Bass’ does not actually refer to a bass at all. Shockingly, the bass, which Britney assures us repeatedly and almost dementedly “IS GETTING BIGGER!” seems to refer to a gentleman’s schlong, one we would assume could be described as a grower, not a shower. Whether the impressive manhood in question belongs to will.i.am himself remains to be confirmed, but one thing is for sure: Britney Spears’ treble is not a pretty sight.
2nd place: ‘(Drop Dead) Beautiful’
‘(Drop Dead) Beautiful’ is a rather obvious play on the common phrase “drop dead gorgeous”. Luckily for us, in the lyrics there are also some rather obvious mentions of penises. Britney tells her lover (presumably a different one from earlier, otherwise this would just get rather tedious) that he must be “B-I-G because” he has her “hypnotised”. This is a clear comment on the massive nature of his wang and not, as you may be led to believe, a clever and witty reference to the work Biggie Smalls (RIP WE WILL NOT FORGET etc).
This is confirmed when shortly afterwards she exclaims, “What I’m looking at right now would make a big girl cry.” Why would the Notorious B.I.G. make a big girl cry, you ask? He wouldn’t. He was quite nice, apparently. Ask P. Diddy. Obviously, the penis in Britney’s eyeline is pupil watering gigantic.
Finally, featured “rapper” Sabi (who?) perhaps gives the most blatant shout out to the most useful part of the male anatomy when she confesses, “I don’t need your money. I just want your D.” Charming.
Written by Jasmin on 16th Mar 2011 and filed under General
We all know that Britney Spears’ Femme Fatale has found its inevitable way to her fans’ ears before its official release date, though we had no idea we would get to listen to the whole thing this early. Instead of posting a formal review, however, we’ve decided to wade through the 12 tracks on Britney’s latest LP and offer you a numerical experience with which to enjoy the album. (FYI, expect the numbers to change when we finally hear the additional four songs included in the deluxe edition.) 1, 2, 3, Peter Paul and Mary, jump below for Femme Fatale – By The Numbers!
Britney Spears Femme Fatale By The Numbers:
Number of songs that are about Britney hooking up with a stranger at a club: 6 (“Hold It Against Me”, “Seal It With A Kiss”, “Till The World Ends”, “How I Roll”, “Big Fat Bass,“(Drop Dead) Beautiful”)
Number of songs about Britney hooking up with someone she already knows: 6 (“Inside Out”, “I Wanna Go”, “Trip To Your Heart”, “Trouble for Me”, “Gasoline”, “Criminal”)
Number of songs not about Britney hooking up: Zero
Number of cat references: 2 (”This kitten got your tongue tied in knots…” from “Till The World Ends”, and “Got nine lives like a kitty cat” in “How I Roll”)
Number of dog references: 1 (”He’s a dog astray” from “Criminal”)
Number of references to “the floor”: 4 (”Till The World Ends”; “Big Fat Bass”; “Gasoline”; “on the dancefloor” in “Trouble For Me”)
Number of bad pick-up lines: 3 (”If I said I want your body now, would you hold it against me?” and “You feel like paradise, and I need a vacation tonight,” from “Hold It Against Me”, and “Your body looks so sick I think I caught the flu” from “(Drop Dead) Beautiful”)
Number of sly references to erect male genitalia: 2 (”It must be B-I-G because you got me hypnotized… Cause what I’m looking at right now would make a big girl cry” from “(Drop Dead) Beautiful”; the bass continuing to get bigger and bigger throughout “Big Fat Bass”)
Number of references to killing someone/death: 5 (the chorus of “(Drop Dead) Beautiful”; “Dying for company” (not to mention the apparent impending apocalypse) in “Till The World Ends”; “You set me on fire” refrain from “Gasoline”; “Hope to die” from “Seal It With A Kiss”; “He’s a killer just for fun” from “Criminal”)
Number of All About Eve quotes re-purposed to apply to hooking up: 1 (”Fasten up your seat belt, it’s gon’ be a bumpy ride” from “(Drop Dead) Beautiful”)
Number of different types of alcohol Britney drinks without a mixer: 2 (Tequila on the rocks in “How I Roll”; whiskey straight in “Trouble For Me”)
Number of times it sounds like Britney is having an orgasm: 2 (Very beginning of “How I Roll”; breakdown of “Gasoline”)
Vegetable shout-out: 1 (”Steaming like a pot full of vegetables” in Sabi’s rap in “(Drop Dead) Beautiful”)
Fruit shout-out: 1 (”Wanna taste forbidden fruit” in “Seal It With A Kiss”)
Number of songs mentioning Britney flying/changing altitude: 3 (”Trip To Your Heart”, “Big Fat Bass”, “How I Roll”)
Number of songs addressing the DJ directly: 2 (”Till The World Ends”, “Big Fat Bass”)
Number of times sex/love is referred to as a trip/vacation: 2 (The chorus of “Trip To Your Heart”; “You feel like paradise, and I need a vacation tonight” in “Hold It Against Me”)
Amount of dubstep: A lot
Number of Britney fragrance shout-outs: 1 (”Your body feels like fantasy” in “Trip To Your Heart”)
Number of references to past Britney songs in the chorus of “Inside Out”: 2 (”…Baby One More Time” and “(Drive Me) Crazy”, which also makes an appearance in a lyric from “Trouble For Me”)
Number of times a G-rated word is made to sound like a much dirtier word: 2 (”You can be my thug tonight” and “Go downtown where my posse’s at” in “How I Roll”. How “If You Seek Amy” of Brit & Co.!)
Average amount of times we’ve listened to this album since Friday: About five trillion.
We know each and every one of you loyal Britney fans are waiting patiently until the album is officially released to legally procure it for your various music-playing devices — but if you’ve heard Femme Fatale’s 12 tracks on assorted Internet sites, what are your thoughts? Better than Blackout? Or is it impossible to pit genius against genius?
Written by Joanna on 15th Mar 2011 and filed under General
Simon Cowell Is Planning Japan Relief Single With Justin Bieber, Britney Spears, Katy Perry, Cher Lloyd, and more.
The pop music community has started to mobilize in the wake of the tragedy of Japan’s devastating earthquake and tsunami. Simon Cowell announced via Twitter yesterday that he is putting together a Japan relief single that will include contributions from Justin Bieber, Britney Spears, and Katy Perry. This morning he added more names including Jessie J and X Factor alumni JLS, Olly Murs, One Direction, and Cher Lloyd. In the wake of last year’s Haiti earthquake, Simon Cowell spearheaded the charity single “Everybody Hurts” which sold nearly 500,000 copies in its first week of release.
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